Unsolicited Advice

Hmmmm, I actually don't know how to start this, but I've been thinking of writing my opinions about love that I've shared in the chat room or with the private conversations I had with my online friends.  I know many of you will raise eyebrows and say, "A spinster giving advice on love?! WTF?!"  Oh yes and why not?!  I may be single, but  I have my share of love's ups and downs.  And this is not just about my experience, this is about our experience, yes, OUR, you, me, and the people around us. You might have read and heard some of them, these I think are the ones you need to remember if you are in an online relationship, or even personal relationship, let's at least ponder on the following...(nosebleed! tissue pls!).

• Find your happiness.  According to Lolo Mario in the coke commercial "napaka-bilis ng panahon. Hanapin mo ang magpapasaya sa'yo, Huwag mong sasayangin sa mga walang kabuluhang bagay", we all enter in a relationship to be happy, if you're not, leave and find someone that will make you happy, madami ng ginagawa si destiny para iasa pa natin to sa kanya, but in doing so, wag ka naman parang pakakak na lahat nalang ng lalake o babae feeling mo sabel this must be love na ang drama mo, ramdamin mo din at pag-aralan mo.  Life is too short to be miserable.

•  Be faithful.  When you find the one that makes you happy, the one that give colors to your sepia life, be monogamous.  You're not a butterfly that can sip nectar from one flower to another, you're not destined to be like that, wala kang pakpak!  In short wag kang manyakis!  And please, don't lie!

• Be honest.  It is still the best policy,

•  Be yourself.  If you're looking for someone or already in a relationship, it's best to be yourself, show who you really are. Be genuine. Wag kang pamember ng recyclable team... wag kang plastic!  Don't put your best foot forward because eventually you'll get tired of it.  

• Give your time.   Most of the time, because of our busy schedules, we tend to take our partners for granted, coz we think that they are just there and they will always understand us.  But that's a no no!  In order for a relationship to grow, it needs your effort, your time...YOU.  If you are too busy to give it to someone, you are better off alone, coz it will never ever work out.

•  Respect your partner.  Being in a relationship doesn't mean that it's all fun and sweetness.  As I've said before you are two different individuals with different DNAs, backgrounds, likes and dislikes, naturally there will come a time that you will clash.  And if this happens, respect to each other should still be there.  This would mean;

• No cursing, no name calling, no shouting.  I know it's hard not to raise your voice when your mad, but as much as possible try to be calm.  Don't call your partner demonyo, baboy, hayup, bwitre etc etc etc.  And of course do not ever curse! Wag na wag mo syang murahin, it's disrespectful.
• Do not go to facebook or twitter or chatroom and do your ranting.  Utang na loob, walang pakialam ang mga kachatroom mo, kapeysbuk mo at katwirer mo sa mga pinag aawayan nyo.  Resolve your own issue.
• Don't divulge each others secrets.  Never as in never share your partner's secrets to your friends.  Also, please don't share videos, pictures and conversations that would compromise your partner's reputation.

• Don't give up your career.  Your online bf/gf is still "virtual", so don't believe in everything he/she says.  Pwede nya sabihin na you two will get married, and because of that you are running to your boss and giving your resignation letter. Unless you meet and get to know the person well, and you are very sure that he'll marry you and he has the money and is willing to support you, you shouldn't be thinking of giving up your career!

• Give each other space.  Don't lose your individuality. Allow yourself to do things you enjoy doing when you were single.  Don't forget your hobbies, go out with your friends, or just be alone.  And allow him/her to do the same. It's a breather to every relationship.

• Do not give your password and ask your partner's password.  I know some of you share your passwords or get the passwords of your partner.  For me, it's a no no. It's something personal, you are the only person who should know your passy.  People who have trust issues are the ones who do this. So if you both trust each other, then there's no need to do this.

LOVE...LOVE...LOVE